Monday, April 10, 2017

Visit to the Riverbend Library--Monday March 10, 2017

Due to the review of the medical files over the last 60 or so days before Questioning I had no poetry books to read. It was horrific. How does one endure life without poetry? Well I had music and paintings to sustain me but it was still hard.
So since Questioning is over for a bit and will resume soon enough I was able to go to the Riverbend Library today to find books to read.
It was delicious. I had eaten a rather brick like burger before I left and so I was feeling seriously full but then there was a comfy chair available where I lolled like a glove on limp hand.
I had my poetry books like faithful wagging dogs on a leash and I had the Scientific American magazines in a pile that I went through looking for clues in the advancement of the species. I found very little evidence for progress in science which indicated to me at least that dedicating my meagre research skills to the boys for the past 22 years had been a better investment of my neural capacity than the work I did in research.
After reading about the wasp that injects venom into a cockroach to prepare a living host for her baby wasp I was happy. It's very satisfying to see the Alien type situation in the insect world and understand that the similar situation in human beings is fully due to evolution.
After reading about the venomous wasp which wasn't unique since many wasps apparently do the zombie incubator trick, I read other stuff that got me up to speed with the world of plain language science. I found no other magazines to read and the newspapers weren't there so I could not read the news. The place was full of kids being tutored by other folks and so it felt very good that I no longer had to pay for a tutor for younger boy. He is fully immersed in his program and whatever he does there will be due to his 24/7 immersion in computerland that thankfully does not seem to require a tutor at this time.
I lugged home my books. I will read them like the starving bookworm that I am. The main problem with the lawsuit is that I have to read medical files and read about system wide failures in Alberta's health care system rather than a book of poems. Now that I have to wait for the next bout of Questioning, I have some time to read poems.
If you are ever at the almost empty nest stage of your life with one kid out and the other one almost out, think of poetry --as the bridge between motherhood and the next career as a fully fledged writer of songs. It's always best to have belief or you won't make it as a writer. Belief is the curtain you draw about yourself as you take off all your clothes and show your naked soul in a poem. After all what is a poem but the soul revealed?
Remove the hands from your face. Look at the world calmly and reveal yourself. That is what poetry is. Nakedness. Courage. Calm.

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